Red shoes, No knickers

Mixology Archive

Thursday

16

April 2020

2

COMMENTS

Quarantine Chic

{A 15 year old cardiganos, a stale nightie, some D.I.M.D.I vans and 5 day old hair ~ Quarantine Chic 2020}

 

How green is your catwalk? How sustainable is your vision? How circular is your economy?

 

These were the questions Vogue found dominating the Spring 2020 catwalks back in October 2019. They were legitimate questions and ones that once again will need answering. But not right now. Time, like fashion, changes quickly and these questions are no longer on everyones lips.

Having finally arrived in the Spring/Summer of 2020 a different crop of questions appear to have arisen. How long can I wear my tracksuit bottoms before I need to wash them? Is a common one along with Why bother with a bra? and Should I go grey?

The predictions for what we’d all be wearing this season have been thrown out of the window as ‘We the people’ take back our style. No longer will we be dictated to by large fashion conglomerates urging us to partake in this environmentally destructive industry. No longer will we be a slave to trends and a desire to fit in. The rules have been relaxed so much they’re taking an afternoon nap….And we’ve never looked better.

Here with correspondence from the front line are the ways in which we’re defying what was expected of us and creating our own Quarantine Chic

1. Comfy bums

Whether it’s an old pair of leggings that have seen better days, some tracksuit bottoms with stains on them or simply your TKMaxx workout pants ~ Bottoms are comfy AF. No restrictive waistband need apply for status during this time. Elasticated or ‘way too loose to be seen in public’ waistbands are what we’re looking for. Along with baggy knees and an unflattering butt. Comfy bums do exactly what they say on the tin but perhaps most importantly, with all this sitting around that’s currently popular, they don’t give you trapped wind. Winning on all levels.

As the weather heats up a random selection of shorts are representing Comfy bums.  They can be unattractive sports shorts, way too flimsy running shorts or simply inappropriate for public short shorts. Any will do they simply need to be accompanied by an unshaven leg and a severe need for a pedicure. Reports coming in from a nearly 40 year old woman in South East London, and I quote ~ ‘…My legs are so hairy right now as I was walking around my flat last night – legs out – I could feel a breeze in them..’

2. Underwear? Nowhere!

It’s a controversial trend but one I urge you all to embrace. Firstly lose the bra. Don’t even look at it. Let your baps be free. Give them time to unevenly swing and bob about with not a care in the world as to who’s checking out those sweet nippy titties. All the way over in Hove I heard whispers of individuals still wearing a bra simply for that feeling of relief when it’s whipped off come 5pm. Whatever floats your boat.

Speaking of boats, if you haven’t already, lose the under crackers too. Going commando is the new ‘wearing underwear’. It’s everywhere. I’ve never had such a low rota of washing clothes. Saving the environment AND airing your overgrown privates? What’s not to love about this trend.

3. Mixology

A personal favourite of mine that has spilled over from previous seasons. Mix and match has never been so prevalent. Put it all on together. Think more mixing and less matching. Actually forget matching altogether. Whilst standing in my local post office queue for 45 minutes the other day I felt particularly proud of my outfit. Some grey bobbly leggings paired with bright blue and yellow bermuda shorts. An orange puffer jacket was involved whereas a bra wasn’t. The cohesion of this outfit was immense. It reminded me of way back in mid March 2020 when I would pair a nightie I’d not bothered to change out of with some trainers and a winter coat just to take the bins out. Trés chic.

4. No Poo & No Slap

Trend forecasters may have predicted with the return of the roaring 20’s chic bobs and kohl lined eyes would once again be en vogue. It appears none of us have chosen to take up these styles. Instead we’re putting down the shampoo altogether and letting ‘natural oils’ style our dos. ‘What a state’, ‘So overgrown’ and ‘No, it’s just greasy’ are compliments often heard on the front rows of FaceTimes.

Whilst the majority of makeup is gathering dust on dressing tables the red lip appears to still be going strong. Stylistically, for me, it brightens a dry, sallow, zit riddled face.  It was spotted twice in that 45 minute post office queue and it’s also making a regular appearance at group Houseparties accompanied by raging insomnia and a pint of Gin.

5. 50 fades of Grey

The colour of the season? According to the projections of fashion weeks there’s never just one but this season those in the know went with Grey. Whether it’s old leggings, baggy jumpers or bottom of the drawer underwear. It could be your lover’s tracksuit bottoms, the colour of your society deprived skin or simply your roots coming through ~ grey is everywhere.

From slate to marl to Jaime Dornan’s acting this is a colour that needs to be embraced as well as revered for providing comfort and solace at this, what I would say, real moment in fashion history of great grossness.

As for accessories ~ Bags are so last season as are heels, boots, brogues, oxfords, wedges, mules…basically anything that isn’t a trainer or a slipper. Jewellery appears to be worn either not at all or all at once so it isn’t, like a large portion of the workforce, made to feel redundant.

Whatever style you choose to adopt this Spring/Summer be safe in the knowledge that it hasn’t come from the catwalks. No magazine or influencer predicted your chosen chicness. You did it all by yourself using the clothes you already own, a dearth of hair dye/clippers and a lack of interest in showering each day.

If you’re over on Instagram wearing your latest pristine Ganni dress whilst sitting in your flower filled garden, then good for you! Go for it. I, on the other hand, am bucking the trend of keeping it together and am currently on my South circular facing balcony wearing a pair of unflattering trousers I cut into shorts, a t-shirt I’ve slept in for 3 nights and roots Debbie Harry would be proud of. Once again, Trés chic….

Posted in Comfy chic, Fashion week, Inspiration, Inspire me, Mixology, Summer plans

Monday

5

August 2013

0

COMMENTS

Strapless wonder

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When I have to spend 8 hours of the hottest day of the year inside then I need to be in something cool, loose and light which is everything is dress is. I say dress, it’s basically a piece of material with two pieces of elastic involved ~ waist and top. Couldn’t be simpler and it works so well. I will often take this on my travels and she always makes an appearance every summer

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{dress from bondi beach market, belt from this dress, office heels}

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Oh…and I joined Bloglovin’ if you’re a fan…Head on over here

Posted in Comfy chic, Mixology, Outfit city

Friday

21

June 2013

0

COMMENTS

Monday

3

June 2013

0

COMMENTS

Print.Stripe.Print

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Finally the spring is back in my step as I get to really use the most favourite part of my wardrobe: My summer clothes. HALLEJUJAH! My self designed cute sailing print jacket that comes as part of a suit {see here}, Sister With Massive Laugh’s navy halter neck from when she was 15 {I like it because when wearing it with no bra my boobs look really good. She doesn’t like it because when wearing it with no bra her boobs look like they’ve had an arguement} and my chazzer shazzer leopard print skirt that was a bargionous £1. {Also seen here}

Oh I do love to play in the fruits of my closet. Nothing new, nothing borrowed, a lot of tings blue ya see!

Mixology at it’s very best.

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{self designed jacket, gifted halter neck, forever 21 elastic belt, chazzer shazzer belt, m&s sandals}

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Posted in Chazzer Shazzer chic, Mixology, Outfit city

Monday

5

November 2012

2

COMMENTS

A new crew

Hurricane Sandy may have kept me across the pond for a little while longer than expected {all fine and safe thanks kids!} but a small amount of goodness came out of my extended stay.

I discovered my winter style.

Ever since I had to, extremely reluctantly, pack away my enormous and widely unused array of summer greatness I took out all my {felt like 4} winter pieces.  I didn’t like any of them. All my clothes felt old and tired and just not me anymore.  I was basically in need of  a Wardrobe Detox from someone but seeing as I’m the only person I know who does them I was stuck.  I painstakingly packed up a few items for NYC and then had to wear all 4 outfits for a week! We were hand washing nix in the sink & turning tops inside out.  I’ve never given up on fashion so wholeheartedly and not been bothered about it.

Then I discovered J Crew.

Oh be still my beating heart.  I fell head over heels in love with the place.  I basically found a shop that housed everything I wanted to buy and everything I want to wear this winter.

I’d read about the shop before, seen blog posts about the new collection coming & popped in last time I was in the States but nothing caught my eye.  This time my eye was caught and I was a goner ~ hook, line & credit card sinker.  It is the perfect mix of masculine & feminine of classic & quirky.  There is bright colour everywhere but it’s not outrageous & a leopard print accessory is a staple.  NEED I SAY MORE!  The term ‘preppy’ was always banded around in association with the brand but as a non American I don’t think I fully understand what the word actually means!?

All I know is that opposites attract, it’s what I constantly tell my customers & now J crew has simply brought it home even more for me.

Yes! I do want to wear my sequined pencil skirt with a chunky knit.  

Yes! I will wear my new M&S tapered navy trews with a silk blouse & my new reworked military jacket.

Heels & cropped trews = WINNER!

Stripes, animal print & brocade ~ You had me at J.  

I’m heading upstairs right now {actually once the useless builders sorting out my bathroom have gone} & getting rid of a lot of my current clothes.  It’s not going to be pretty but a serious cull needs to happen so that I can step into winter looking & feeling like me….& not me 2 years ago.

I went into J crew 3 times ~ I’ll share my goodies with you bit by bit ~ and when googling them back in the UK I found their website with FREE INTERNATIONAL SHIPPING AND RETURNS!!!!! Oh I can’t believe it!  Dangerous times ahead.  But dangerous with J Crew simply feels exciting…..a bit like hanging of Daniel Craig’s arm whilst parachuting down the side of the Empire state building. Know what I mean?

It’s good to be back my Shoelets…I hope you’re all looking fabulous, sexy, stylish & awes-balls.  What am I talking about…..I know you are.

Posted in Inspiration, J crew, Mixology, Wardrobe work

Monday

6

August 2012

0

COMMENTS

Major mixing

It’s been a while since I’ve indulged in some serious Mixology.  A mix of prints and colours that make people look at you like you’re majorly cray cray!  A quiet Saturday working in The Shop followed by a Wardrobe detox was always an opportunity to indulge and get some eyes rolling on the train out to Reading.

As a fabulous –stolen from another friend who didn’t want it and then it was eventually – gifted to me present from Tim, this vintage kimono style dress was easy to wear and was begging to be teamed up with a leopard print pump and a trusty de-neem jacket….I mean who wouldn’t!?

{gifted dress, vintage sunnies, hobbs flats, orla kiely pink bag, kimchi gold bag, reworked denim jacket}

Posted in Mixology, Outfit city

Thursday

26

July 2012

0

COMMENTS

Summer suit

Having mentioned last week that I was OBSESSED with the skirt suit, I thought I’ d showcase another one for you.

{m&s sunnies, american apparel white vest, gifted spotty vest, orla kiely suit, folk shoes, remeber2morrow paper beads}

If there is a matching bottoms – skirt, trews, shorts – to a jacket that you’re looking at then I would always suggest buying the set.  There might not be many occasions that you’ll wear them together but you’ll get use out of them as separates and that one time when you do want to dazzle and look sleek – exactly what a suit can do, my Shoelets! – then you’ll be able to with out the use of a cardigan – STEP AWAY FROM THOSE CARDIES LADIES!!!!!!!

To stop it looking too ‘worky’ simply balance out with different textures {velvet, jersey, lace}, put tees underneath, pile on lots of jewellery, roll the sleeves and pop the collar, wear with a boot…..da da dum, da da dum and the beat goes on.

Posted in Mixology, Outfit city, Suit you sir

Monday

23

July 2012

0

COMMENTS

Fleece me

Yes.

Yes I am wearing a fleece that I found on a chair in my kitchen.

So? Sue me! I LOVE IT! I love it’s brandlessness, it’s colour, its size and its warmth.  Apparently it is my flatmate’s aunties that she was lent last year and I have managed to nab it for me sen.  I can imagine that you thought you would never catch me in a jacket that people wear for orienteering or car park control at festivals but I have fleeced before {see here} and I am a sucker for making practical wear look shit hot chic.

{found fleece, gifted shirt and bag, vintage skirt from hk, umbro socks, lacoste brogues}

Due to the fact that I was not wearing jeans, a joomp or walking boots – I done my opposites my Shoelets! – and with a little rolling of those sleeves I rocked out in my fleece and felt snuggly warm when the rains came.

Posted in Mixology, Outfit city, Tricks of the trade

Wednesday

18

July 2012

3

COMMENTS

Breast power

See the light and dark of this photo?  Well it represents the good side and the bad side of what I am wearing.  The ying and the yang, the Ant and the Dec.

The good side {Dec} to this is that I loved my outfit – I had a bit of mixology going on, got my waist in, comfy outfit all day at work that went seamlessly into going out at night.

The bad side {Ant} was that it put a heavily pregnant woman into hospital.  I shit you not!*

These badboys were the culprits.  My breasticles.

Admittedly they don’t look much in this picture but believe me these puppies were selling A LOT of  jewellery by day and inducing babies by night.  They were admired, commented on, laughed at and stroked by Tim.  What’s my secret?  Oh thanks for asking kids.  Well the answer is the element of surprise.  I don’t get my tiny titties out often because, let’s be open and honest here, there ain’t much to get out! But with the right apparatus and the right accompaniments you can pop these iddy bitties out and make a newborn a cancer instead of a leo.

{gifted military jacket and mint bag, m&s sunnies and wedges, only hearts top, vintage skirt from hk}

Hit them where they’re not expecting it my Shoelets.  If you get your tits out all the time – give them a well earned break and cover them up. Why not show off your back fat, your legs, PUT THAT CARDIGAN DOWN!!!!! {a permanent detoxing gripe I like to bark} and get your arms out for a bit of much needed sun.  Always in flats?  Break out a heel, Always got your hair up?  Shave it off. HA! I’m kidding, I know the 90’s is back but no…simply let it down.

Surprise, along with cumin, is the spice of life.  It makes us sit up and notice…and is also a very hard stain to remove.

Tim started wearing purple for the first time since 1979 – She’s never looked so damn fine.

*She’s fine but, as a fellow titless wonder, she did say my boobs looked amazing and it was the shock of them that made her need to lie down for the next two weeks.

Posted in Mixology, Outfit city, Tricks of the trade

Wednesday

11

July 2012

0

COMMENTS

Dolly mixture

Having bestowed upon you my desire to steer away from tee’s this summer and head face first into the world of the classic shirt….I’ve done the opposite.  I’m sorry! But a lass of a certain age is, surely, allowed to change her mind no?  Yes! Yes she bloody well is….RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

{gifted tee and luella skirt, m&s sunnies and wedges, mine large shopper, crochet bag from a small shop in cyprus}

This summer’s style – so dem pesky magazine’s told us – was supposed to be all about pastels but apart from the odd mint nail here and there I have not seen much dolly mixture dressing going on.  It wasn’t my favourite style to come forward this year but once I’d embraced it in nail varnish form {see here} and been gifted this skirt I think dressing like a sherbet dip suits me and my faux ginger bonce.

What say you?

Are you a fan of the pastel hue? who would you rather dress like a Belieber than go near a baby pink pashmina? Tell me.  In fact call me and tell me. Over.

Posted in Mixology, Outfit city

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