Red shoes, No knickers

Monthly Archive: May 2013



May 2013



D.I.M.D.I: Flamingo pink take .2.


Don’t you just love it when a plan comes together? YEAH! This joomp above was originally this joomp below:

I loved it as a light grey jersey and she did some well earned time on my torso but then the inevitable occured ~ stainage. I can’t tell you what it was or how it ended up there but what I can tell you is that it was in my eye line and it bugged me big time. Along with this shirt I headed over to the washing machine and made all my day time {between 12 & 1pm, when I’m on the bus} dreams come true.

Pink, pink to make the boys wink:




{ joomp and skirt {see here for her transformation} m&s sunnies and wedges, gifted vintage coat, orla kiely bag}


Posted in Did It Myself, Didn't I, Outfit city



May 2013



Rise to the occasion: Princess layer


When a free trip to the theatre {went to see Book of Mormon kids ~ GO SEE!!!} has been on the cards for a while but the weather of Great Britain is sticking a big two fingers in your face there’s only one thing to do:

Emigrate Layer up!

I couldn’t put tights on because I’d told my good self that I wasn’t going to wear tights again until Autumn so the leggage had to be out but the sweet, sweet body was layered up my Shoelets, layered up! Thermal vest, petticoat, dress, cardiganos, kimono, coat, scarf…this weather ain’t got shit on ma style! Don’t let  it get you down either.



{chazzer shazzer coat, gifted scarf & kimono, american apparel yellow cardi, vinatge dress & heels, orla kiely bag}


Posted in Chazzer Shazzer chic, Outfit city, Rainy days, Rise to the occasion



May 2013





May 2013



D.I.M.D.I: Flamingo pink

pink shirt

When someone passes on their unwanted clothes to you it’s easy to get carried away with the situation. Free clothes, after all, are a bonus and not to be sniffed at. However, just because they’re free it doesn’t mean they’re right and there’s no point in filling up your wardrobe with clothes that don’t suit you and that you feel guilty about throwing out because someone gave them to you in an act of kindness. Let me tell you something my Shoelets: Kindness don’t know a draining colour when it’s shoved in it’s own hairy face.

My good friend, co~worker, long time twerking partner and the mother to my children, Tim, very generously, after a clear out, passed on a few sweet treats to yours truly. As well as this shirt and this one I managed to obtain the one above. It’s soft, it’s a nice shape. I wore it twice. I looked like I was covering from a bout of gastroenteritis each time I wore it.

‘Dat colour is wack y’all!’

And by wack I mean unsuitable for 98% of the skin tones out there.

Come on.

It’s me.

I don’t leave a man down unless there is no trace of a pulse and Father MacDougal has been summoned to perform the last rite of passage. Well, Father Maccy D’s was on holiday in Costa Brava y’all and this shirt’s second chance at life  came in the form of…YES YOU KNOW IT PEOPLE!!!



Sweet baby Jesus I love this stuff. It’s like catnip for the crafting world.

Easy peasy.

Powder in drum * Salt over powder * Wet clothes on top of that * Spin that cycle


I think that we all agree on the fact that, should such an award exist, this shirt would most definitely win ‘Shirt of the week’. I am I right?  You know it.


{grandma wyn’s reworked burberry trench, d.i.m.d.i shirt, gifted luella skirt, vintage boots, orla kiely bag}



Posted in Comfy chic, Did It Myself, Didn't I, Outfit city, Tricks of the trade, Wardrobe work



May 2013





May 2013



Peachy treats


As I mentioned here my underwear drawer is in dire need of an injection of sexual summit summit. Every time I open it up I feel like I’m looking into a barrel of second hand knickers in a charity shop.  To describe them as the dregs would be an understatement. NOT ANYMORE! I headed to M&S with my £5 voucher from when I took my pieces in for Schwopping and treated myself to some basics {a pack of massive apple catchers and a pack of thongs. black. cotton. staple. love ’em} as well as this peach sweet dream of a treat.



You know I love anything peach and a matching set with a discount is even better.

‘What’s the point in telling us about a discount that’s past and gone?!?’

I know! Seems stupid doesn’t it? Almost as if I’m rubbing your noses in it?

I’M NOT!!!! I would never do that my Shoelets….there’s still a chance to get some mullar off your new undies.

Head to any M&S & pick up one of their little brochures like below. On the back is the chance to get £5 off when you spend £30 or more on underwear…YEAHHHHHH!!!! Back in the game!


Offer last until Wednesday 22nd May so hurry on down.

I’m getting my second lot of lingerie with this discount too.

Winner, winner my new underwear makes me look like a sinner! YEAH!

Posted in La Peche, Schwopping, What lies beneath



May 2013



Inspire me


This week’s inspiration has most definitely come from Angelina Jolie’s recent decision to have a double mastectomy. She wrote elequently and quite simply about her experiences, and why she chose to take such a drastic decision when she doesn’t currently have breast cancer, here in The New York times.

There are times when we all feel less feminine {and not necessarily through choice} whether it’s to do with feeling too tall, having big feet, a dark moustache, problems with our hair, our ovaries or, personally for me, our breasts. Having had a flat chest my whole life I have come to terms with it now and love my peanuts on an ironing board.  But in the past my itty bitty titties did sometimes make me feel less of a woman. I always thought that if anything ever happened and I had to have them completely removed it would be the worst thing. Regardless of how small they are, not having them at all would be even worse.

Reading the article that Jolie wrote, one line in particular stood out:

 ‘On a personal note, I do not feel any less of a woman. I feel empowered that I made a strong choice that in no way diminishes my femininity’

I am so inspired by this to make my own femininity with what I’ve already got. Let’s make our own strong, female choices. Let’s wear bright red lipstick, high heels, floral dresses. Let’s not think that being feminine is just about the physical aspect of our being but something that we can control and decide upon through our clothes, our behaviour, our scent and our actions.

Strong women are dominating my world recently {see here} and Angelina Jolie’s decision to talk about her experiences and share such a painful time with us all to bring awareness to such a shitty disease puts her firmly on my long list of great women.

Posted in Inspire me



May 2013



Summer plans


{kos last summer}

This time last year I made a list of  things that I wanted to achieve during the summer. I only managed four out of the ten. One is still ongoing {writing letters to everyone took longer than anticipated}, one was just plain ridiculous {what was I thinking wanting to make these. I’m not 17 & 8 stone!} and the last one ~ watch a film outside ~ was scuppered due to the preeettty bad weather we had.

Regardless of not being able to fulfill my dreams for those forth coming partially sun filled days I’m making a list again. YEAH!!! I love a list kids. These are my plans for Summer 2013:

1. Find a strapless bikini that suits my body

2. Try out a new and exciting salad once a week

3. Buy a cool pair of trainers that I can wear with trousers AND skirts.

4. Go swimming at least twice a week

5.Eat outside in the garden more often

6. Swim in the English sea {this was on my list last year but it has to be done, right?}

7. Find the perfect Mexican blouse

8. Start wearing hot pink lipstick {oh and find one first}

9. Be more adventurous with my hairstyles

10. Throw a themed BBQ in my back garden {I’m thinking Mexican. It’s gonna be a Mexican themed summer methinks}


{Olympic stadium. London 2012}

What are your plans for this summer my Shoelets?

Let me know and let’s make these next couple of months AWESBALLS!!!

Posted in Summer plans



May 2013





May 2013



Man repelling shoes


I will not be wearing these shoes to Bobbi’s wedding. I’ve come to that conclusion this weekend.

Why not? I hear you think. Good question my Shoelets. Good freaking question. I’m not sure I am able to explain it. I love men {I’ve been writing about them over here this week} and I like to feel on a level playing field in every aspect when I’m socialising with them. That’s not to say that I wouldn’t wear a dress, I’m definitely going to be wearing a dress to the ceremony, but if I had a choice I would probably don El panto to hang out with them. It’s not that I don’t want to feel feminine around them, on the contrary, I love the differences between men and women, but for some reason I don’t want to be seen as girly. Do you get me?

Bobbi’s wedding is coming up at the beginning of June and it’s a weekend affair. On being told that on the Friday there was clay pigeon shooting for the men and a trip into town for some pampering for the girls I balked and spat out my dummy. I told Bobbi in no uncertain times {read: I demanded} that I would also be coming clay pigeon shooting and ~ having done it before in the Untied states of Awesome ~ once I work out which eye to close I am really good at it. All women are now invited to the clay pigeon shooting thanks to my demands.

As if the pressure of finding a wedding outfit wasn’t bad enough I now have to think about what to wear for shooting. What does one wear for such an occasion?  Ironically these shoes would be perfect. Their height {I’ll be nearer the pigeons}, great stability and no thin heels sinking into the grass. But these are Man repelling shoes and as much as I love them I know that I am going to be looked at like a fool by most of the men standing around holding fire arms.


Why should it matter? I’m gutted that I’m bothered but I am. I don’t want to be seen as a silly and frivolous and have the fact that I’m going to shoot just as many fake pigeons as they are overlooked because I’m going to totter up in ridiculous shoes. And let’s be honest….these shoes are frikkin’ massive, clowny, clompy and totally ridiculous. I’m not expecting to get laid in them {although that would be highly amusing} but I’d just like to not get judged on my huge shoes.

Am I pre~judging the judges?

Am I being foolish?

Can I wear tweed to go shooting in or is that too much when out of London and somewhere that might not know what an Urban outfitters is?


Posted in Beautiful shoes, Bobbi's wedding, Let's discuss, Rise to the occasion


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